2018 in Review: The Bad, The Worst, The Great | Local and Destination Wedding Photographer Rebecca Beatty
2018 has had so much going on that it’s hard to wrap my head around it as I sit here on my couch, with my butt-head of a dog beside me and we prepared for this ball to drop. But I just kept thinking about all that happened this year and how draining, exciting, and new it was.
So I figured, why not express (vent) about this year and all it’s changes. Starting off with the bad.
In June, I had a real life nightmare that happen and that was both my hard drive and my external hard drive crashed and locked up. I was in the process of copying all my RAW files over, sessions, etc to a new hard drive when Mother Nature and my computer disagreed and everything shut off. But of course there had to be a little bit of smoke coming out from the hard drive.
Of Course it did.
To some it may seem like just a hard drive.
All my raw images, all my sessions, my weddings, everything was on these hard drives. My entire work, my reputation, EVERYTHING. Was on there. So I panicked. And if you know me then you know that I think the most horrible things first before I actually know the end result for anything.
Or maybe something that was almost as equally bad as the hard drive crash of 2018, was when my camera stopped working during a session.
Not only did that leave me panicking, but it also left my bank account crying.
A lot of people that aren’t doing photography professionally, that are just doing it on the side or as a hobby, they don’t understand the stress that having your only equipment break and having to skip on a bill here or there to fix it.
“Well you have your other job—-”
Let me stop that thought for you real quick. You see, I don’t have another job. I don’t have any other income that I bring in to support myself or my family. So when I say that both my hard drives crashing and now my camera breaking, I hit a low point of just wanting to give up.
But those weren’t the worst to happen this year. As most of you know my mother relies on me to help take care of her. And this year some things happened and we needed help. Unfortunately we got answers that none of us wanted to know or hear. Right after that, my Uncle (who has always worked since he was a young kid) got very ill too and it flipped his world upside down.
I remember when the Doctor was speaking that my mind drifted off and I was driving down a road that was full of speed bumps and then half way through this road was a tall, brick wall.
Obviously I couldn’t drive through it, I couldn’t reverse out. So what was I to do?
And that’s how I felt about what the Doctors were saying about my mom and my uncle, that we had hit this road block with a few options to go through it.
For a little bit, I didn’t want to work anymore. I didn’t want to edit, I didn’t want to shoot. My passion disappeared because to me, making sure my family was better became number one, and my work because number two. I lost that healthy balance between keeping both stable and both at number one.
But out of all the bad, there was a ton of positives too.
I finally got to start traveling for my business. In May I got to go to Alabama! I got a rent-a-car and drove the full nine hour trip there and back by myself (which let me just say real quick, that journey from the top of Alabama to the bottom was the longest, literally a straight road of trees with a few cities here and there lol)
But also I got to go to the beach for the first time! I had this amazing Summer vacation with some of my closest friends and even got to be a part of a special proposal.
Not only there, but I was able to travel to Mexico and witness two people who love each other more than any tie the knot. I was able to ride on a yacht for the first time (and may never happen again lol).
And that’s not all of it. I got to meet some amazing clients this year, I accomplished my goal of shooting at least 22 weddings this year. I gave some of my friends confidence again with a boudoir session.
I got to meet a bunch of my photography friends that keep my grounded and understand the pain and struggles I go through.
But most of all this year was the true meaning of growing and reflecting. I’ve learned a lot about photography, my friends, loving myself and loving others.
There’s going to be days that I feel like a failure and that’s okay. There’s going to be days when I mess up, and that’s okay. I could wake up tomorrow and think why am I even doing this, and guess what, that’s okay too.
But there’s something that keeps me going. And if you feel like that too just know that I have faith in you and know you can accomplish it. And just know…